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June 13, 2006

Most Americans Confused About Who to Hate This Summer

Hatepoll_thumb As Americans begin the busy summer driving season, a new poll reveals that most are confused about who they should hate and why. While last summer's 'must hate' favorites, including war-critics Cindy Sheehan and Michael Moore, are now regarded as hated has-beens, few new 'hateables' have captured the public's attention.

Poll: Mahmoud Ahmadinejad easy to hate but hard to pronounce.

By Deanna Swift

Hatelist WASHINGTON, DC—Americans are already weeks into the busy summer driving season yet most still lack a clear sense of who they should hate and why. The current murky forecast stands in marked contrast to the hazy hate-filled days of last summer, in which most Americans agreed to hate anti-war activist Cindy Sheehan, whom they blamed for dominating news coverage, causing traffic jams in much of the southwest and driving up the price of gasoline.

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Who do you hate?
According to the results of a recent poll, most Americans have all but forgotten Ms. Sheehan. The Polltronics poll, based on 2,130 telephone interviews conducted earlier this month, found that while 63% of Americans report feeling "mildly irritated" at the mention of Ms. Sheehan's name, only 9.2% say that they are prepared to hate her "most of all" between now and Labor Day.

Sinking like a stone
Also falling short in the blame game these days is one-time controversial filmmaker, Michael Moore, hated by fully 39% of Americans last year. By contrast, only 7% of respondents indicated that Mr. Moore would continue to top their "most hated" list this summer. While the angry auteur may be off the hook for the summer blockbuster season, 56% of Americans said that they were prepared to resume hating Mr. Moore when his film "Sicko," a thinly-veiled attack on the American health care system, widely viewed as the best in the world, debuts later this year.

No one left to hate
The anxiety that many Americans feel about not knowing who to hate has only worsened in recent days with the news of the death of Abu Musab al-Zarqawi, who'd been widely regarded as a replacement topic for Ms. Sheehan during talk radio summer sweeps month. Thirty-eight percent of those surveyed said they'd planned on hating Mr. Zarqawi "more than anyone else" during the months of June, July and August, but were no longer sure to whom the top spot should belong.

Hatepoll_1 Anxious Americans did get some relief from their worries this week with the announcement that Iraqi militants have appointed a successor to Mr. Zarqawi. The new leader of Al Qaeda in Iraq is said to be Sheikh Abu Hamza al-Muhajer, which means "the immigrant." Sixty-one percent of respondents said that they would be more likely to hate an immigrant than a native-born American.

Also rans

While there is no clear front runner among those likely to make the summer's "most-hated" list, several early favorites have lost steam in recent weeks. Among them: Hillary Clinton, pedophile priests, teacher unions and Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. Forty-two percent of those surveyed said that they would be more likely to hate Mr. Ahmadinejad "most of all" if his name were easier to pronounce. Also dropping from the top spot: gays, who turned in a disappointing performance during last week's debate over amending the Constitution to ban gay marriage.

How this poll was conducted
Samples for Polltronics polls are random digit samples of telephone numbers selected using the "probability proportionate to size" method, which means numbers from across the country are selected in proportion to the number of voters in each state. Individuals who did not answer their phones were assumed to be watching one of the following cable news shows: "The Big Story" with John Gibson, "Special Report" with Brit Hume, "The O'Reilly Factor," "Hannity and Colmes" or "On the Record" with Greta Van Susteren.

Have you decided who to hate this summer? Talk back to deannaswift1@yahoo.com.

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Comments

Nope, I'm pretty set on hating President Bush this season. And next season.

Posted by: Unknown | Jun 15, 2006 10:53:35 AM

Some suggestions:

1. Focus on people who have served in combat in the military. Remember, each veteran running for office is a slap in the face of our Lord and Savior, George W. Bush, and thus automatically worthy of us good Republicans hatred.

2. Look for someone using their brains rather than their gut to decide who to vote for. Make fun of them and taut them cruelly. Remember, these "smart people" are the same ones you used to give wedgies in gym class. Now they are your boss. Time to give them another wedgie, right?!

3. Find a web site that proclaims that it values that un-American "logic" and "reason" stuff. Accuse the proprietors of being un-American, and probably a gay-marrying flag-burning liberal who hates our troops. Oh, "deranged moonbat" is a good one. They toss that "logic" and "reason" stuff at you, call them a "deranged moonbat". That will show them!

That should give you a start on finding new people to hate this summer. Enjoy!

- Badtux the Republican Penguin

Posted by: BadTux | Jun 14, 2006 11:42:25 PM

The field is littered with the mangled bodies of those who earned our hatred. If there's one failure of our current politico-religio-corporato-militaro-espionagio-plutocratocracy, it's that they haven't generated enough recognizable scapegoats in the last few months. Millions of stupid people with bad teeth and an Invisible Invincible Imaginary Friend are in need of a target.

You're right on about the confusion. I blame the First Felon for this lapse. He's wasting time doing whatever he's screwing up now instead of creating wedge issues and boogeymen.

Posted by: Nemo | Jun 14, 2006 2:31:42 PM

Would hairstyle and fashion choice count when determining candidates to hate this season?

Posted by: Treva | Jun 14, 2006 2:40:15 AM

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